SCARED AGAIN

Lost among the cacophony of life
dead amid my myriad emotions
extinct in my routine life and mundane commotions
Yet again,
it’s a hope I had stopped hoping,
it’s a step I had stopped taking,
destiny has started playing the funny game,
skipping beats, heaving chest, warming ears,
moody songs, abrupt smiles, sudden cheers,
Running away since years I have come to a full circle
I think it has happened again

I said I was a dreamer but guess I wasn’t the only one,
Should have stopped a while before but all I did was run
a tryst again with kismet which I can’t avoid,
venturing again into the fool’s paradise to fill the void
Been alone but haven't felt lonely since quite some time,
scribbled here and there but the words did not rhyme
I shudder at the thought of taking the leap again,
I hold myself back fearing it would hurt again,
I think after a long a time I am scared again.


© Biplab Patra and biplab7777.blogspot.com, 2019. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Biplab Patra and biplab7777.blogspot.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

LETTERS TO LOVE, TIME & DEATH --- inspired by the movie "Collateral Beauty"

In my letter to Love I asked,
why does it hurt when it’s supposed to heal?
Why am I numb when I am supposed to feel?
There is pain and suffering in the pursuit of love
Wars fought, Hearts broken,
men have fallen in your checkered history
Souls abandoned who were yours to save
eyes with hope now lie closed in their graves
There is no one there who has never felt you ever
So why should we crave for such sophistry

Love replied,
I am in darkness , so am in light
I am in giving up , so am in the will to fight
I am in the beginning, so am when the end draws nigh
I am the reason for every WHY…..
It ain’t how much you get but how much you give
Am I supposed to save those who can’t find any reasons to live?

In my letter to Time I asked,
Why do you destroy if something is good?
Why don’t you tick slow when you know you should?
Withering beauty, frail voice, greying hair, senses you impair
But since eons you stare, not a bit you ever care
Future becomes present and present becomes past
Never have you been enough but a perennial curse
It’s just you ticking in your lone race to outlast.

Time replied,
I am a gift to placate your plight
I grant contingent to set the wrongs right
You can set the alarm but not me
You can try hard to get me , but ain’t ever gonna be
All you do about me is complain and whine
But look, you got enough of me in a day to rise and shine
 

In my letter to Death I asked,
Why does everyone has to go?
Why do I have to bear the separation woe?
You are the travesty of ‘The Inevitable’
Embodied as the only ‘Constant’, you are the constant fear
Across the splendid fabric of life, you are the ultimate tear
I know all about you,
being the ultimate truth, the curtain call of life’s skit,
the destiny which we all should embrace, and all the intellectual bullshit
But I don’t get back the one I lost & You don’t get what did it cost.

Death replied,
I can’t give back yours what’s taken
I can’t set right the lives I have shaken
Hate me with everything you can
But don’t forget where it all began
The love, the warmth, the laughs you shared
the tears, the hugs, the moments you cared
Being the survivor, to keep it alive is your duty
The one gone lives on through the memories
And that’s the COLLATERAL BEAUTY.

© Biplab Patra and biplab7777.blogspot.com, 2017. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Biplab Patra and biplab7777.blogspot.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

WE ALL LOST

Drowned among the glowing screens
Having lost the essence of interaction
We swipe left and swipe right
Expect likes, full of spite
No conversation, no confrontation
No obligation, no regulation
A visitation of vexation
Self-subjugation of validation
Enduring eternal suffocation

We argue over isms and term people ists
Atheist or Sexist or Racist they insist
My wall is full of phobias, no time left for philias
We post more in most case
We tweet more and greet less
We pout more, act out less
We share more and care less
We poke more and joke less
We troll, judge our soul less

Lost among the deafening commotion

We crave at times for humane emotion

We search in the past, we search in the future

Coz wounds at present are far deep to suture

Can we get some, if we give none?

We talk peace, but we shoot gun

We feign pain, but we poke fun

We crave acceptance, bt still shun

Still can try, bt we are all done

We all lost, No one won

© Biplab Patra and biplab7777.blogspot.com, 2019. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Biplab Patra and biplab7777.blogspot.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

The walls are closing in.......

To forget one's self in another,
Was it a virtue or was it a sin.
Screaming out loud in silence,
I could feel the walls were closing in.

Moments were difficult to let go unnoticed,
However busy I tried to be,
Had everything in the world at my dispose,
But in spite of all it was only me.

Having parked the car, I still din get out,
Staring wide with no good reason.
I wasn't coming back to a home but a house,
It never mattered, what was the season.

There were no more voices in my head,
An eerie silence took its command.
I could feel my limbs go numb at once,
the moments slipped through my fingers like sand.

In the battle between me and my monster,
I never wanted my efforts to go in vain.
I ran towards the light at the end of the tunnel,
Only to realize all of a sudden, it was the light of the train.


© Biplab Patra and biplab7777.blogspot.com, 2019. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Biplab Patra and biplab7777.blogspot.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

The Letter

Times i never wanted to recall
Things i never wanted to say

Words were never enough to express
Price in pain i was never ready to pay

I wanted it to be special
I wanted it to be great
I wanted it to be in a way for her never to forget

Each word i penned down was a memory in itself,
Every moment i described was a piece of myself
For years i had lived dragging the heaviest fetter,
Well from me to her it was my first letter

I stopped when it was around eleven pages,
I wanted to say everything, i thought since ages
Much still was left unsaid in my mind,
The child in me thought there will be many in future, this was just the first of its kind

We loved, laughed, cried and tried,
Revived the phoenix of emotions umpteen times but it died
I rue the fact that we grew apart,
The barrage of memories were always difficult to part
But have been through a lot and its time to cut me some slack,
No hard feelings, but i really want my letter back.

© Biplab Patra and biplab7777.blogspot.com, 2019. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Biplab Patra and biplab7777.blogspot.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Wo Lamha................

अचानक से इस भीड़ भरी ज़िन्दगी में जब गुजरा एक पल तनहा
           जाने कहीं से याद आ गया बीता वो हर एक लम्हा
कभी तुम्ही से शुरुआत थी ज़िन्दगी और तुम्ही पे ख़तम
             तुम्ही से थी हर वो चीज़ ख़ुशी की और तुम्ही से सितम


वो लड़ाइयां अब भी है यादों में बसी
वो साथ तुम्हारा देता है एक अजीब सी ख़ुशी
वो भीनी सी खुशबू तुम्हारी साँसों से जाए नहीं जाती
     वो प्यारी सी मुस्कराहट तुम्हारी अब भी याद है आती
तुम्हारे साथ  बिताया हर लम्हा वहीँ थामने को जी करता है
    पता नहीं हर एक बार तुम्हे देख बार-बार देखने को दिल करता है

डर लगता है कभी कभी,  खो न दूं तुम्हे कहीं
डर लगता  है कभी कभी रो न दूं मैं कहीं
रात दिन सुबह शाम हर पल तुम्हारी बाहों में बिताऊँ
      तुम्हारे बुलाने  से पहले ही तुम्हारे पास दौड़ा चला आऊं
जानता हूँ फ़िज़ा हो तुम , तुम्हे रोक नहीं सकता
    जानता हूँ हवा हो तुम , तुम्हे टोक नहीं सकता
आज इस दिल से बस निकलती है एक ही दुआ
    खुश रहो हर पल, चाहे कुछ भी हो हुआ

याद रखना तुम्हारे लिए एक आशिक़ इंतज़ार करता है
     तुम्हारी यादों में खोया हुआ, तुम्हारे साथ को तकता  है
उम्मीदों से भरी ये ज़िन्दगी भले ही तेरे याद में कट  जाए
     मांगता हूँ खुद से आज तुझे मेरी भी उमर  लग जाए

© Biplab Patra and biplab7777.blogspot.com, 2019. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Biplab Patra and biplab7777.blogspot.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

फिलहाल मैंने जीना सीख लिया

ख्वाइशों की कश्ती लिए
                      जाने कब से चले थे हम
मीलों दूर किसी अपने के साथ
                       सपनों की नयी बस्ती बसाने चले थे हम
फटते हुए बादबानों को ना जाने कितनी ही बार सी लिया
                        ऐ ज़िन्दगी फिलहाल मैंने जीना सीख लिया

परायों को अपना बनाने में
                        कई अपने छूट गए
एक को मनाने की दौड़ में
                         कई सौ रूठ गए
इमरत की तलाश में, न जाने कितनी बार ये ज़हर पी लिया
                ऐ ज़िन्दगी फिलहाल मैंने जीना सीख लिया

रातें कई बीती
                   उन सितारों की आस में
मैखानों को घर बनाया,
                   उसकी एक झलक की प्यास में
आसमान छूने की चाहत में इस ज़मीन से नाता छूट गया
                   ऐ ज़िन्दगी फिलहाल मैंने जीना सीख लिया

उजाड़ना ही था तो बसाया क्यों
                   बार बार, बार बार आरज़ुओं को जगाया क्यों
सुकून की खोज में सारी नींद गवां बैठे
                    नादान थे हम की मझधार को किनारा समझ बैठे
ना कोई चाँद थी, ना कोई चकोर
                    आवाज़ दिल टूटने की थी, सूना बस उसने शोर
ना था हमपे उसे कोई हक़
                     खुद ही हो गए थे उसके बिना कोई शक
गिर, पड़ , उठ, चल, आखिर मैं दौड़ने लग गया
                      ऐ ज़िन्दगी फिलहाल मैंने जीना सीख लिया

बहक कर कई बार तेरे किस्से सुनाता  हूँ
                      सिगरेट की शमा की आड़ में खुद को जलाता हूँ
ज़माने को हसाती ये आँखें नम हैं
                      इस हंसी के मुखौटे के पीछे छुपे कई गम हैं
कुरेदे हुए इन ज़ख्मों पे आखिर मैंने मरहम लगा लिया
                      ऐ ज़िन्दगी फिलहाल मैंने जीना सीख लिया

अर्सों बाद इन आँखों को एक नयी मंज़िल दिखी है
                      फिर से इस कलम ने एक नयी बंद लिखी है
ख्वाइशों के परिंदे ने भरी है एक नयी उड़ान
                      जाना पहचाना सा है रास्ता पर अब की बार है एक नया मुकाम
बस ज़िंदा रहना किस्मत नहीं है और, आज फिर जी भर चीख़ लिया
                      ऐ ज़िन्दगी फिलहाल मैंने जीना सीख लिया

© Biplab Patra and biplab7777.blogspot.com, 2019. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Biplab Patra and biplab7777.blogspot.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.